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Dec 19, 2010, 12:40 PM
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Member Since: Oct 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 274
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((((((((Bpd2))))))))
Thank you for post! I have 3 extra kids on top of mine We all know that sometimes being a parent is the best job of self sacrificing....Seeing my kids happy is great for me...I am actually floating in a high place above me right now..Trying to stay grounded but anxiety is at high levels...My middle daughter is going into the big city tonight. Umm I am very protective with my kids do to allot of my past (a*use)...Anyhoo, point is I know that it will only be the mom and the daughter and my daughter, but I am sick, sick...Part of letting children grow is simply doing THAT...My own memories have kicked in and flashbacks are at a high point. I am basically living in dissociative state to deal? Wont talk to T cuz I am still made at her... She was very kind and did apologize but it really hurt my feelings that she tells me to write things and I do then she get's all excited about ONE SENTENCE that my well condition is not ready to DEAL WITH...Point so sorry that's why I refrained from writing I am all over the place However it's a beautiful very cold day up here...I am starting all my pizza dough it's cheap home made and kids can eat till there sick...So that's what I have to feed them lot's of any kids of pizza they want ...Erm popcorn, chips salsa...I made pie ...A couple cheap candy dishes, crystal light cheap and good for you, some cheap diet soda....Movies and we have games systems on each floor thank goodness for just being patient and saving money so that's taken care of...The girls have list complied of what there going to do...So yeah...I am almost in tears, laughing, and exhausted reading this all at the same time lol...But I did want to check in...You all have been wonderful in suggestions and just all over a great sounding board for me and just thank you......
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the past is my future. the pain is my emotion that is my prison. what I feel is as confusing as to why I feel it?
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