i feel i might have missed a step in this. after reading post for a few hours i see people post about themselfs as well, i think my problems started when i was 14 both my parents got cancer at the same time while my father recovered after 6months of kemo my mother battled it tell she died a year later after that my father and i tryed to rebuild a family, but he lost intressed in his son after a few months within a year my father began to date another woman leaveing me at home for long times the longest being a weekend. after some time with his new found girlfreind he told me there were getting married, and that we were moving.i struggled to fit into the new life, but soon found i wasnt wanted in his new family. things like lock out of the house, hiding food from me, charging rent (that came from the ss beafits for suvivor) became everyday things for me, i was told to see a therapist and i did, i didnt go for long as i didnt want to be there, and i didnt feel much help was gotten from it.my sister who is 6years old has since seen a therapist and was told she was bi-polar and manic depressive, i think she is doing better, thats part of the reason i am talking here. i struggle and hide the fact that i am unhappy. but as i posted a bit earlyer i cant bring myself to ask for help. at the point now it has effected every part of my life. from working to sleeping. i say all this for a few reason first on this forum i have a bit of security, i know something has to be done before i can live and feel again, and i am so tired of thinking i am worthless. i dont post this to upset anyone, and i am sorry if i does.