i did have a reply typed out,but im afraid it seems to have disapeared.
But thankyou everyone for all your kind words.

Omers, I just wanted my T to discuss my emotions and feelings which were at the time quite confusing so that I could get a better understanding of myself. But this may have been a fault on my part as im really not good at expressing myself.

Ive just called a good friend of mine who knows me pretty well,after a talk i eventually promised him i'd make an appt with my gp or a councillor sometime this week. i wish i hadnt promised this, going to be very busy and not in thr right frame of mind to do this.
thank you for the birthday wishes but its actually in 4 days time but again thankyou,its nice to know that someone out there is listening.