Wishing you best of luck with this, keep your strength!

1) Let your lawyer know about your anxiety, maybe he can help "insulate" you as much as possible.

2) Hopefully most of his "argument" will get immediately crushed, but at least the discussion should be directed at the judge rather than at you. In court, you are there to present arguments to the judge, not to argue with each other. If he tries to talk to you hopefully the judge will shut him down immediately. If he does try getting to you, don't take the bait Don't argue back with him, don't talk to him. If you get upset see if you can whisper your objections to your lawyer so you can get them off your chest without contributing to the scene in the courtroom. If you become involved in an argument this will anger the judge. If you stay silent while he rants it will just make him look bad.

3) Remember that any accusations as to who's fault caused the divorce, is COMPLETELY IRRELEVANT. The court in the divorce awarded YOU custody, and gave HIM the liability of child support. He legally has to pay child support. He can't come up with excuses "after the fact". The judge doesn't want to hear any of that nonsense. If he has addictions there is little chance of changing the custody arrangement, and even if there was, THAT WOULD HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH THE $2000 HE IS IN ARREARS, HE STILL OWES THAT, and this is the only issue in front of the court at this time.

4) Finally, keep in mind the fact that this really has nothing to do with you, it is for the sake of your child. Anything personal he slings at you, you have to do your best to let slide off of you, because bottom line you are there not to prove or defend anything with regard to your divorce, only to get him to pay the money he LEGALLY OWES (and morally and ethically owes) to help raise your child in a healthy and secure environment.

I hope this isn't too hard. Hopefully keeping some of these things in mind will help you to get through difficult periods. I want to say again to let the lawyer know how you feel and your situation (including the depression IF you trust him and if you think he will understand its significance and if it won't be an issue in court). This will certainly not be new to him and he may have advice for you out of his experience, and may also be able to help deflect a little if he knows this is an issue for you.

And keep posting here. We'll help keep you in touch with your inner strength that depression often makes us disbelieve that we have.

-- The world is what we make of it --
-- Dave
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