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Originally Posted by whatlight
Just stole the name from a Wilco song The song is about doing your own thing...
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now that you said that, i totally have the song stuck in my head! Now i need to go listen to it
Quote:
Originally Posted by whatlight
My T whom I trusted deeply for several years (mostly in couples therapy) told me that I would never like myself enough to leave my husband. Does anyone else think that this is some sort of violation? Do you think he ever had any intention of helping me? 
I'm glad I'm still in my marriage  , despite it's pitfalls and struggles. My family is the most important thing to me, an d I know that maybe I sacrifice myself too much sometimes, but in the big picture, it's what makes me happiest.
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ok, i see two things going on here. 1-why do you think he says that you would never like yourself to leave him?
1a: did you go into therapy with the intention of getting a divorce, or on the precipice of one?
1b: and if so, could you see that maybe what your T sees is a hurt person who is afraid to own themselfes, believe in themselfs 100%. If you were self-confident, and you went into this therapy with maybe the intention of getting a divorce, you would NEED that confidence to get through it all.
1c: Or you guys went in just to sort out some issues...did more stuff come up through that?
and 2: You said you sacrifice yourself too much...but in the big picture it akes you the happeist. What I worry about is what you are actually sacfricing for the "greater good." Are you sacrificing some parts of being you in order to make the happy family? Because I generally think it doesn't work out that way. The way children are happy is because their parents are happy people in and of themselves.
Now I know that I went off on a presumptious tangent, but I was trying to understand what happened here, because it seems to be an entire split between what the T said and what you think.