chicken_wing, I have the same fears as you do!!! When my T recently went to a country I didn't think was so safe, I fell apart. I worried every day about her, and missed her more because of my fears. She didn't allow email when she was away, said she may or may not have access to it. It was awful for me!!!

I asked the same question: what if she doesn't come back? I told her my fears and she said "I will come back. I will be safe." But that's not the truth, and I know it. That's why I worry about my kids too. Well, she DID come back, of course, but what about next time?

More often than not, an old T told me, people come back. I guess you just have to trust in a higher power about that.

I'm not much help, but want you to know you're not alone in your fears.