Maybe this is more a BPD thing, but then again, you guys are my family, and right now I haven't officially been dx BPD - so here goes.

I've been hypomanic, had insomnia (mildly), been very irritable.
My boyfriend is out drinking with a friend (It's 8:30PM here) and I;m trying to convince myself that it's OK to be alone. But I'm battling. And he won't answer my calls, so I'm feeling rejected and lonely. It's triggering emotions I cannot put my finger on. I've taken some sleeping aids and hope I pass out, but it's not really a long-term plan.

I don't know how to self-soothe, so I usually just try sleep though these emotions.
Why does a situation like this (And I'm not going to argue that I am intensely jealous of my boyfriend's mate for being out with him, when I want to be with him) trigger me to such an extent?
Yes, I have a bit of a rollercoaster relationship, but it's been going quite well at thet moment. I hate having to admit I'm being triggered....
I feel I'm no longer in control!