I think a very important thing that my therapist has told me (repeatedly) over the years is that they are just feelings.

They aren't going to overwhelm me, or kill me. They are just constructs existing in my mind that, usually come from an old place. Not exactly relevent to the situation at hand.

Learning to sit with distress has been a valuable skill as well. Mindfulness has helped a lot with that. There are DBT workbooks available online.

It's not necessarily the content sometimes, but the fact that I am taking action toward making myself feel better, and not being so reactive to the feeling has always held a lot of currency for me. But it's a hell of a lot of work. I've been astounded at the amount of discipline that is required.

Most of the time I manage, but sometimes, well, it's just hard. I'm getting better though.

Of course, sometimes faking courage sometimes not, developing good loving relationships has been the single most important thing for me. I started - and don't ask me how I managed to do this, I just did! - volunteering at a wonderful place that works for and cares for homeless animals. It's a miracle to me to be around people all centered on a common goal. It's like instant comraderie, instant common interest.