I think there is a type of unspoken rule that you as a person do not decide when you "get atttention". Other people decide when you are worthy to get it. really strong, worthy people disdain attention and turn from it, is the old saw. My mother uses the "oh, they just want attention" as the supreme denigration of a person. It implies lack of character, spoiledness, weakness, dishonesty and manipulative behavior, and a certain, shameful childishness.

I think there are a lot of people in my mom's generation, particularly women, who only got attention by being martyrs, sex objects or by actually being sick. Any other time they were expected not to exist until their services, whatever those were, were needed. They themselves were not supposed to need or feel. They certainly weren't supposed to remind people that they present and had lives to attend to. Many of these folks fit the description above beautifully. They are masters at suffering and don't you dare try to help them, no matter how they moan and ask for it They will make sure you fail and will add you to one of the dissapointmments in life.
Or they end up like my mom, ready to point out the folks who were made by the system she holds onto so tightly. But then, they will also point the same finger at any one who speaks up for themselves. Happy to say, I haven't seen anyone go so far yet here on PC! Whooooohoooo! HUGGGSSSSS Alllll!