Sometimes, my therapist would call my flash backs fantasies.
He agreed that i sing to him but after my singing he focused on was much more on how alluring i looked to him - and that his feeling while watching me sing MEANT that i had tempting behaviors that need to be addressed. He hinted that the assault i have been through happened because of those so called luring unconscious behaviors.
From the very beginning - first official session after making diagnoses - he stated ( SEEING ME SECOND TIME IN HIS LIFE) that i have a lot of sexual fantasies.
Last week he said "we have the heat on, so you can take your jacket off" I did have a sweater beneath the jacket and i know that it is like "make yourself comfortable" but still i felt warning signs all over my body when he said it.
When i meant to just tell him my experience of him he smiled and cynically said "thank you for analyzing me" When i told him i did not mean to analyze him and i knew it was my subjective experience. He said i was defending myself and escaping. Then he apologizes but it did not help my feelings.
After diagnosing me with DID in addition to PTSD, and doing such wonderful work with my selves, self esteem - well at least helping me - directing and reminding me here and there - today he told me - "i don`t think you have DID you have PTSD we will start exposure therapy. "
uuuugh!!!!