I'm sorry you are going through this. I, too, am living a lie, actually many lies, but I'm hanging in there. I think if you confided in your T he/she may be able to find a way to treat you without just throwing you in the hospital. There are programs out there that are there to keep people from the hospital. As for the cutting, try to keep busy. What helps me to keep from cutting is constantly keeping my hands busy, staying away from sharp objects, and reaching out to others, even if it seems repetitive, constant, and burdening. Do it just to exist for now.

The only place I can really be myself is online, on this site, and chatting with my online friends. I know, at least, they will accept me for who I am. Around where I live people are very biased and bigoted. Very judgmental. Anyways, I just want you to know that you are NOT alone and that we care very much about what happens to you.

Try to hang in there and stay safe. If you need anything...anything at all...remember we are here for you even when you are in your darkest hours.