@Mike - therapy without the lovesickness is really terrific. I hope you get to try it!

My new T, she wants that I should be able to figure "it" out myself. She's willing to validate me, hug me, reassure me, show caring - things my exT never did. She's taken the "am I worthy?" question off the table by giving me a "yes". She wants me to be independent of her in being able to understand myself, "the answer is within you" is what she tells me. The things that I figure out through self-examination are little accomplishments for me, by me! Of course I tell my T, and she's proud, but that's not what drives me. I'm just amazed at my own power.