Yea, I am not worried about hurting others, but afraid to mention the fear about harm coming to people I love because then maybe it will come true. Most of my worries are about losing loved ones, or them being harmed. Mostly my birth daughter and my second husband. I have 6 kids, who I worry about at apropriate times. But some times not. 4 are step and two are mine. They are all grown. One is moving to a new continent, but she already proved herself by moving to an Island in washington with nothing but the clothes on her back and a local friend. She found a job right away and did well for herself. I will worry when she moves, or I don't hear from her. But with my daughter, I worry constantly she is going to get hurt or killed. She lives in the city. She rides her bike at all hours. She is a beauty and artistic and a kind soul. She is something special in my life that I don't want taken away.
Then a constant worry that hubby will die, If I don't hear from him, or if he's late or whatever comes up in my screwed up head it's because he's dead.
No therepists at this time, have to look into CMH.
I have also given everyone in the imediate family-hubby and kids- specific instructions for what to do if I should die, and I already have it planned in my head at least what to do and who to call should hubby die.
My family laughs and says I am morbid. Wish I didn't have these thought's pop up.
Used to be constant worry my hubby was going to leave me, for no apparent reason, constant until I started on meds. And intrusive thoughts on morbid things.