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Old Dec 03, 2005, 01:23 PM
Anonymous29319
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yes once you know the memory content of learning how to speck those other languages you will be able to do so at the level of the memory content. you remember how to do it so you can do it.

Drawing - well I have thoughts and images just like a normal person does and I also have flashbacks so I have plenty of material to draw - if I know how to draw. Right now the trick is noting I am thinking and seeing is being drawn so that the pictures on the drawing pads are not even a close representative of what I am thinking and seeing basically because I don't have the memories of the mechanics of drawing like shading, perscective, sizing and so on. basically right now I know that my memory piece Mary draws so I am trying to in a sense copy what pictures I find laying around with her name on it. I have listened to the voices in my head closely now for 4-5 years so I can distinguish which voice is the memory of my voice at that age so Ican now ask a question and wit for the answer for example shading is what I have been working on. Art books from the library say start simple when learning to draw - draw shapes and shade them. I like how while in the memory piece of "mary" I shade things so I asked ok mary how do you shade squares and other shapes. then I wait and listen for that voice and an answer that has ANYTHING to do with drawing. It was almost instant when I heard -sunshines light where sun hits and datrk where shadows are. So then I know ok think about the sun shining on the shape I am drawing. color in darker wher the shadow is and lighter where the sun shines on it. I can now shade shapes. while being completely aware. How did "mary" tell me that? well she is not a person. she is a memory. Just like a computer a person types in a question and the results that come up is what has been programmed into the computer through stored information. the computer does this by matching words. My brain works the same way. the words of my question was matched until the memory of the information came up. kind of like a normal person is asked whats 1 + 1? The brain automatically finds the answer in the persons memory so that the person can say 2.

As for what people can do while in memory pieces. people can only do what is in that memory content. Like my memory piece Tiny. When I have been triggered into that memory piece I cry and suck my thumb. Thats all I can do so most likely thats all that memory contains something happened where the result was I cried and sucked my thumb. I can't be made or do anything in that memory that isn't stored in that memory for example as Tiny I cannot use a cell phone. Why? because one when I was that age there was no such thing as cell phones so I couldnt have been made to use a cell phone during an abuse situation at that age in order for the activity to be stored as a memory. When in a memory piece that memory ONLY is acted out. nothing more and nothing less. If the person is being asked to do something that is not in that memory piece, like a computer the brain matches and switches the person into the memory that contains that information. This is called rapid switching, revolving door effect something is triggering the person to keep switching from one memory piece to another. I can start out in a therapy session fully aware and then lose time and then become aware and my therapist will tell me what went on when I wasnt aware. and in some cases she has varified that she has talked with me on more than one topic and more than one memory state.Because I am a rapid switcher and I have so many different memory pieces she has trouble telling the difference between my memory pieces unless I am in one that is so noticably and drastically different in facial expression, tone of voice, attitude, mannerisms and so on. An angry memory piece cannot be made to laugh and so on, a happy memory piece cannot be made angry and so on. The behavior, mannerisns, language, words, posture, tone of voice and so on are only what is contained in that piece of memory. Theres no way to change or alter the already stored memories. memories are stored as they are experienced during the original experiencing of the original situation. In some cases where the memory content is violent such as I threw a table at my therapist. I don't know the process behind what she did to change this. Just that she was told by contacting professionals in the field how to add the information that I was not to throw anything during sessions. I do know that part of the process was that she had to talk to me whle I was in that agnry memory piece so basically to start with she had to intentionally trigger me and get me angry. which I consider very brave of her to do considering the session before I had thrown a table at her while in the memory piece she had to intentionally trigger. I also know that that was not the only memory piece she had to do this process with. Basically for hers and my safety every known memory piece had to go through the process. But I don't know what that process is just that in order for all parts to contain the shared information I had to experience the working out of the situation while in those memory pieces. its confusing trying to put it into words. basically in order for a memory piece to have new information added they have to experience that new information. in order to do that the therapist has to use the triggers for that memory piece. Margo was the one that threw the table but to make sure it never happened again all memory pieces had to contain the information about the situation and coping tools being put in place to prevent it from happening again so in order for say the memory piece Myself to "share" the information that is contained in the memory piece Margo I had to be triggered into not only the memory piece Margo and have the new coping tools be taught to me while in that memory piece, my therapist had to also trigger me into the memory piece "Myself" and teach me while in that memory piece the new coping tools and why this was needed. I guess the reality of true DID is that "sharing" between each memory pieces doesn't just happen. theres a process behind adding new material. But what that is the professionals don't disclose to the clients because memory content is part of how they can tell the fakers from the true DID's. If all the clients knew how to add say a cell phone use to the already stored memories that could cause alot of mixed up false memory fake for attention type problems. So the treatment plans don't normally include adding new material but focus on taking care of the old memory content and triggers so that the person learns to live in reality instead of hiding in mental safe places, and these exhisting mental safe places are no longer used as escapes for safety but for the normal relaxation type activities. I know sharing between the person and the memory pieces just happens by matching and the person listening to the voices, writing, journalling. the other no idea how my therapist did it or what she was told as to how to do that.

As for the washing machines - I learned how to do the laundry by hand from memory and then friends showed me how to run the updated machines myself. so now I can do laundry both ways. I live in an appartment and the laundry room machine cost is rediculas so I prefer to wash my clothes by hand.