Hi this is for Poet.

Poet what would it mean if your t cared about you? It is hard to actually ask questions on here and do it where one can see that it is caring and gentle. So let me just be clear that that is how I want this question to come accross ok? ()

I also want to be clear that I specifically didn't post this on the other thread because that one is just too 'charged' right now.

I personally tell myself that my t cares because it wasn't getting me anywhere in therapy by believing that he didn't. In fact it was very counterproductive. Poet I am relatively new on this site as well and I have had many posts agonizing about hating t, not trusting t proccess etc. (And I still do struggle with those thoughts!) But I also had to ask myself what was so painful about t caring for me? Why was it safer to invest in it not being real, not being more than a $$.

Poet two of your prior posts really touched me because I saw a glimpse of your pain when you said that you have not had a real family. I felt that because I have also came from a background of outrageous dysfunction (not a family at all) and also when you agreed with me that if you could have anything it would be for your t to adopt you. That was my wish too. I think that connects us at some level.

If t's don't care we can't get hurt anymore right? If we don't feel emotions or are not vulnerable there is no chance at feeling more pain. Lord knows we have felt enough. The only downside to that is a big one. Vulnerability and emotions are a part of being human. And being human is about connection. Poet can you join me in this gut wrenching exploration of pain, loss, healing, love? I don't want to do it alone.