Caroline, I doubt it's a case of the hospital not thinking you deserve help, so much as their failure to recognize the extent of your distress. First of all, please don't give up -- you've got the right idea, that getting adequate treatment is the key, it's now just a matter of fighting your way through the bramble patch. I know it's unfair that you gotta do it just when you have the least ability to do so, but you can do it and you deserve to get that help.

First, a lot of people present very well, which isn't always in our best interests. Even the marriage counselor my husband and I have seen for two years can't tell when I"m falling apart. Makes it hard to me to get help when I most need it. I've been released from the emergency psych unit without any treatment several times, simply because I was too articulate, and the doctors thought that meant I was OK. And a good friend of mine was several weeks into a very severe psychotic episode that his T and his pdoc both missed -- as well as the cops who were called a few times to pay him a visit -- again, because he was too articulate. You're in good company, at least...

As for what to do now, asking your GP to write to the pdoc and tell him that you're worse than that letter implies might be a good first step. Telling the pdoc, when you see him, that his letter did not reflect your actual state -- although I'd recommend reframing it that you hid how badly you were really doing, because sad to say, pdocs have very delicate egos...

Good luck, whatever happens.