Nice place to post this question! Really! I'm thinking about the question. For now, what I can say is that I need a lot of reassurance--even when I'm doing well. I need a lot of praise. I need for the people in my life to be reliable and consistent. I need for them to have a sense of humor!!! I need for them to be kind--to protect me from what is hurting, but to encourage me--just as much, maybe more. I need them to have a lot of confidence in themselves...unfortunately, it is, generally speaking, difficult for borderlines to be needed. I want to be wanted and loved, but it scares me when I am needed.--That's probably why becoming a mother just about killed me. I need people in my life to know that I am not dependable, but that I am trying my best. I want to be good, and when I am not, I hate myself. I want people to know that I cannot sustain my energy levels, my moods, even my interests, that I don't even have an I for long, long stretches of time and I feel like I am faking it--so, I need to isolate, but I am afraid to be alone....so I need quiet and company, but not exactly communication--just a steady presence............I want so much from people. But I will do my very best to be valuable to them, too. It's a fine line--to be valuable, but not obsessive about being valued....