A new year. Everyone makes a big deal.

New years should come with reset buttons. Start over. There's never such thing as a clean slate or a real second chance.

I need that reset button. I love this city, but I can't deal with it anymore. I love my country but I want to jump on a plane and just get out of this place, and this is coming from someone who isn't in love with change. I love my friends, I love my own family, and I know how twisted and selfish it is to say this; but I wish I could just reset it all sometimes. Be reborn somewhere else. Just reset my own life.

I just want to restart everything. I feel like I keep trying to change my life but there's only so much I can try to change when I'm stuck carrying my life. Does that make sense? I don't know. I don't know what I want. I just feel like everything is gnawing at me, gnawing and gnawing and I don't know what direction is up sometimes. I find myself trying to retreat from a reality I cannot change more and more into the books I read and the games I play.

I need a reset button.