I am out here, Yack, and I know what a 500+ on the Holmes/Rhea means. It means that you're an extremely tough person, and that you ought to be patting yourself on the back simply for continuing to function. You seem really frustrated that you can't get your life back to the way it was before all this happened. If that's your goal, you're just going to frustrate yourself. You can get to "normal" again, but it's not going to look the same as it did before everything went down. It's like shaking up a kaleidascope...things can be beautiful again, but they're going to settle into a different pattern than they were before.

If you're feeling like it's time to move forward, then maybe you should make that your focus in therapy. Tell your therapist that you'd like to focus on forming a plan to get a job and move.