I agree with snapdragon928, littlemishka.

Those people aren't your friends at all. They sound like abusive schmucks! Youth can be incredibly cruel. Most teenagers pass this phase of life in the mid to late teen years. Sadly, alcohol and drugs slow the emotional growth process. Perhaps that's why none of your friends have shown any care or love to you.

You do deserve care and love! I'd seriously recommend losing your "friends" and move on to finding yourself. In that process, you'll make true friends that care about you as a human being. As you continue to grow and learn about life, your self-love will slowly bgein to build up. You need self-love more than anything in this world, I speak with experience on that one. Trust me! Personally, I'd rather hang out by myself, than hang out with jerks that make me feel even more suicidal. It isn't worth it ~ not at all!!

Gather strength ~ you can do it!