Pills are an easy answer for the short-term, but it's also beneficial to focus on what the issues really are - like the not sleeping, feels of helplessness and hopelessness. There are many reasons I'm sure for why you are feeling the way you are, you probably just haven't found a way to really express them.

I suggest getting on meds if you feel it's right for you. Sometimes taking them can make you see yourself a little more clearly, and help you understand what's going on with your head. If you don't want to take medication, then try therapy. It could help you...