I feel bad. Really bad. Maybe the worst I've felt in my life. And I can't make myself do anything. They adjusted my meds about two weeks ago - I'm hoping that means that they still might have more of an effect.

I need to go grocery shopping. I have barely any food. I actually went yesterday and almost fainted in the middle of the store and ended up in the ER, so now I STILL have no food (well, nothing vaguely healthy). And it took me three days to work myself up to going to the store that time, so I don't know how I'm supposed to ever make myself go again.

I asked my dad to come visit from out of state for a few days just because I'm really not sure I'm going to be able to make myself shop and I figured that maybe if he came I could force myself to do it. Now I think maybe it was a bad idea because I'm not going to be very good company to be around.

And my therapist is sick and canceled. I feel really overwhelmed by life. REALLY overwhelmed. Just got out of the hospital a week ago for suicidality. Am I expecting too much from myself at this time right now? I usually get everything done. But I just feel so low and so awful and so horrible that it's hard to make myself do anything.

Can anyone relate? Solutions?