thanks, kp... I often wonder if my breaks or periods of increased functioning might be more due to denial than anything. I spend a lot of time trying to ignore a lot of things and trying to keep myself busy. and sometimes, I get busy enough to sort of forget everything for a little while and just live more in the now. but it always ends. sometimes it will last a couple months (still having dips, but no major depression or incapacitating preoccupation), and sometime it will only last a week or two before something will happen that will send me over the edge or bring it all crashing back in again.