Thank you all for your responses...

I guess I was just looking to put things in perspective for myself. I really am thankful for the responses.

". . . It's like you are just existing and not feeling anything. My T says that's the worst place to be because you are capable of anything at that point and really don't care what happens either way" ~ Lexicon said.

I think you said it better than I did Lexicon. I have for so long seemed to be getting no where...or getting any better in feeling good about myself. I feel awful, and I'm to the point where feeling worse than I already am seems like an impossibility.

I feel like I could do anything. Like I could be horrible to myself and others and not care one bit, or be the nicest person in the world and not think twice whether I'm sincere or not.

In being this way I have gotten so much accompished because I have no inhibitions...but I have suffered really bad mentally and emotionally from such.

Maybe I'm thinking about it too much.

Either way...thank youf or your responses once more.