I was thinking about what you said about not seeing friends. I have not had a real true friend in so long I forgot what is like. My wife is my only friend now. I avoid getting close to anyone. In fact one friend from years ago I found on face book and sent a request. He contacted me and then I got request from others back then. My chatted with him and caught up with em then he gave me his number and wanted me.to call. I freaked out and blocked him so he can't contact me any more. He was a good friend but for some.reason I just got so freak out. I don't get that. I definitely understand where your coming from. I want friends but get scared when I get too close to people. So dependent on wife and I don't know why she stays sometimes all the hell I put her through. But I'm glad she is there hate to think about what my life would have been like without her. Any body else would not Have stayed. I wonder how much more she can take sometimes. Well enough of my rambling hope you feel better.