Well actually unimportant things.
i mean - i dent to supress the need to do these things.
i had a lyzer treatment appointment and forgot about it and i feel real bad for what happened because i messed it up for them!! how could i forget!!

well
i always forget lyzer and i push it under my memory or dissociate from it somehoe it seems. then my alters - when i ask - admit they deleated fiels i was working on - from my computer. Deleted very well. and i really have a short flash back when i ask myself - but when i do those things i feel like a man. I CANCELD THELYZER TREATMENT ALTOGETHER BECAUSE anyways its been going on for long and i don`t see more progress than was. and i don`t earn them any moeny. actually despite the fact of me being 25 till now my mom was responsible for it. And i thought it was my step for independece. SO NOW I CANCELED - A WEEK OR 2 AGO - BOTH A UNIVERSITY COURSE - I DECIDED TO stop the course - the BA and now lyzer

they do not truly matter
stayed with work. i am a designer.

huh i feel so bad for messing up they are angry that i forgot about the appointment and they are right. i am sorry.

hugs are wellcome