Hey guys,

So, thanks so much for caring about me and checking on me And those of you who sent PMs and visitor messages, here I am, I am ok! It really touches my heart that you did that

I have taken a break from PC. The reason is this. With everything in my life, almost EVERY aspect is about therapy. I am in therapy, I work in a psychological clinic and talk to people in therapy, I talk about therapy to coworkers, I read books and research articles on therapy, my friends work in mental health.. etc. I suddenly realized recently that I think this holds me back, keeps me stuck. I think some people are really propelled forward in their healing by being on PC and having this place to share. But I think it actually isn't good for my mental health. Mostly because I would spend a lot lot lot of time lurking on PC It became like, addictive. I came to PC a lot for the wrong reasons - for avoidance, for intellectualizing, for running away from feelings. I am obsessed with therapy but I need to wake UP and be present in my life, not think constantly about problems.

Therapy has become very "in my head." And I need to start SEEING it, start FEELING it, not trying and trying to put every little bit into words, not trying to analyze every little thing.

Anyway, I am not really gone. Just taking a break until I reassess things. I need to get into my life. I need to wake up and stop hiding in my computer. Then maybe I'll come back, but not the same as I was before.

I am doing well, I am on the path. My T is amazing and I KNOW she is going to help me. I have never felt more sure that I was capable of being helped. I have been more honest with her than I ever imagined I would be so soon. So, I am doing well -- and in fact, my absence means I've taken a good step for me.