Thanks to all that have responded. I am in therapy and I am working on boundaries an alot of issues with my therapist. I am uncomfortable talking much about sexual issues at least now. my therapist is male and I had a male therapist come on to me once so it is hard to fo there wit him even though he is not like that at all. I am working on a lot of other stuff now. My therapist did suggest couple's counseling a while back when I mentined our sex problems. My husband does have to me demeaning talk that turns him on but has the exact opposite effect on me. I am just hoping one day he will give up....he is 58 yrs old.