This was one of the worst days I have had in a long ***** time. The night before, I was more or less accused of being a thief.

Me and my best friend have been in need of money so we have been getting loads together of scrap metal and copper to make a little extra money.

Out in the yard in front of my in-laws, has been a swingset sitting empty and lonely for some time. My friend and I ask my father-in-law if it was okay and twice he told us it was okay to take, along with other items.

Night before last I got a call from my sister-in-law asking where her money is. I was like, "Excuse Me?", literally confused as to why she was asking me for money. She continues to tell me that I did not ask anyone down there and that I took her swingset and I need to pay her for it.

Now, my friend and I both remember the same conversation, the same event, yet I am told I didn't ask ANYONE down there.

The swingset was in theory my nephews. Guess who wanted to get the side grinder and help chop down the swingset to fit in the trailer to haul.... My Nephew.

I have been falsely accused of some serious allegations before, *though police were never called oddly enough*, and I do not take kindly to someone questioning my ethics and morals.

Needless to say, it didn't sit well, and from that point, until finally last night before I went to bed, I was 110% livid. Last night on has been good barring other medical issues.

Yesterday I was screaming, throwing my cell phone, yelling at my wife for things I should have calmly talked with her about, treating her like I know I shouldnt. I feel guilty because of the emotional damage I am causing. I feel guilty but I dont know what to do.

I have talked to the pdoc and nurse and hopefully by Tuesday she said she can give me a call back. We are going to try to get back on depakote. I was on it before, complained about the weight gain (from 225 to 260), and did so well that like most of us probably at one point or another....... thought I didnt need it. I could give a rats ***** about the weight anymore.... this has got to stop.
Is there any way to help out with these bursts of just INSANE RAGE ?

Currently on:
Lamictal 200mg x 1
Celexa 40mg x 1
(and something else for back pain from a car accident, along with blood pressure medicine as needed *though it should be constant)