NOT leaving.
I want to say why for my self the clinical idea of equating integration with mental health is not sensible and reasonable.
I dont have parts with names- but do have these personified ( to greater and lesser degrees of definition) parts or voices in my head which make me.

But I think of these "parts" as wells. To me, all people who claim some mental health stridently have a pool of self-awareness and experience, history and knowledge. This pool is drawn from to inform thier lives.
I do not have a pool. I have separate wells. This means it takes me longer than the mentally fit to draw all that I want to say or inform myself about- that might be a disadvantage,
however the advantage I have in this mental organization is that if one well is contaminated by a pollutant, this doesnt contaminate all the rest.

If a pool is polluted then all water is tainted. If a well is rancid then another well will be fresh and unspoiled.
Long way around saying I tried and I thought I failed integration BUT I actually suceeded in keeping fresh resevoirs to draw from.
Thank you to this boards community for support and to the PC community and goodwill of members as a whole. Kathy