I said to my T the other day that I may appear to be a hard person on the outside, but I really am soft. I want to be the one people talk to. But I don't come across like that, because I appear hard.
Her reply was: you need to be patient. Put the offer on the table that you're here, but you need to wait for them to come to you.

Think of it as fishing. You need to prepare your bait as nicely as possible. But once you cast it out there, you cannot force the fish to take it. The fish will take it once he's hungry enough, or if the offer is too good to resist