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PT52 · Jan 12, 2011, 02:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by malapp1

Thank-you so much for your reply, she is not medicated and under a tremendous amount of stress. My concern is that she won’t address the delusions or her actions. Her daughter is in a facility now, my God, it would seem that she would understand that this is genetic. I have heard her say that she feels like she has lost years of her life. Prozac was the only medication she was ever on. Problem is she drank excessively when people were not looking. If alcohol wasn’t available, she would smoke pot. I guess all the self-medicating was not a successful replacement for therapy.
I worry that when or if she ever comes out of her delusional state, she may hurt herself. I just cannot believe she could live with herself after what she has done. I am so scared!

Hi, malapp1..it seems as if everyone here has addressed some of the practical steps your wife needs to take. The only thing I will add regarding treatment is your comment here regarding Prozac; having been the Prozac only route, I can tell you that it actually triggers manic phases: the alcohol and pot would likely have dulled that some.

What I'd really like to say is I hope you can find a way to, first, move past the "whys" that are not helping her needs now. Particularly the "why didn't she understand?" I can tell you why, but it's really best to let that one go; there is no answer and it's not helping either of you to focus on that.

Secondly, she will probably not be able to acknowledge anything until she's had treatment, and treatment starts with meds. They don't fix it, but they make treatment possible.

She will eventually be aware of all her actions, even the ones she might not remember will be addressed in therapy. And she will hate herself for it. As the one person that loves her the most, please, please find a way to not judge her. You said she feels like she's lost years of her life; help her hang on to the ones ahead by being an active participant in her treatment and forgiving her (and yourself) for what is in the past.

Quote:

It is one thing to get treated and fight back another, to deny and run. I applaud you. This is a horrible disease for all who it touches. I still love her even though she refuses treatment.

She is refusing treatment because she needs treatment..
sorry for sounding a bit touchy; I've been there. I denied it for a long time, too, with all the evidence right in front of me. I'm going to be 53 in a couple of weeks, and only admitted that I needed real help this past summer. So I know it can get better.

So, yeah, never allow a situation where anyone is in physical danger. But try to love her more than you hate the illness that she has.