That is quite a stream of consciousness essay!
I managed to get many parts of it. I don't think you are really expecting any specific replies. Just wanted you to know "I got it".
Only one comment, if you put in some white space, a couple hits on the enter key, between thoughts, it makes it much easier for me.
<font color=blue>[b] Wherever you go, there you are[b]<font color=blue>
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"...even the truth, when believed, is a lie. You must experience the truth, not believe it." Werner Erhard
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