Quote:
Originally Posted by PT52
I'm BPII - I have hypomania (no delusions), but the depression is more severe. And like BlackPup said, it's a catch 22 - if you need meds, you don't think you need them; if you're on meds, you can easily convince yourself that you don't need them. There isn't a cut and dried answer to why or when someone decides they need help; each one is different. Just because she doesn't want help now doesn't mean that it won't change.
The counselor is right. It's really hard to feel there is nothing you can do. And admitting that you can't help her is not giving up on her. Like being an alcoholic, it sometimes takes hitting rock bottom before someone will admit they need help. And the hardest thing to accept is that there is no guarantee that everything will work out. Maybe if she does have to spend time in the system, they will be able to get her the help she needs.
The what-ifs are tough, no doubt. But you have to take care of yourself first. The thing is, she's an adult; even ill, she will still have to accept the consequences of her actions and make her own choices. And it's clear that you love her very, very much; maybe it's a good thing for now that you can't talk to her. Maybe it will give you both a chance to heal.
Hope that helps.  |
Well, I guess time will tell us the answer. I wish someone could tell me exactly what to do. Do I secretly send her a link to this forum, what do I do. I keep telling myself that it wasn't her and I truely believe that. How does one effectively communicate with a partner who is delusional.
This is not the first time this has happenend to her. I found a note from one of her old boyfriend's, it was clear that they were going down a path similar to this one. I think that as the person gets older and remains without treatment, the cycles become more frequent and more serious. I don't know if that is true or not.
I have a hard time accepting the notion that she has to take responsibility for her actions. If she was in a totally delusional state, what fault does she have. I guess trying to apply logical reasoning to an illogical situation does not work.
I feel like I am in the back seat of an out of control car. I suppose it is fair to say that part of the peril is not being able to regain control. I don't mean controlling her or her disease. I mean controlling my own life. This mess is real but, what she did was a bi-product of her disease. It is really hard to seperate between the two.