I had been doing really well, hadn't cut in like a year, but I was in the psychiatric ward of the hospital for 2 weeks about 3 weeks ago. I got a pass, and on that pass I brought a razor blade with me. I ended up cutting a bunch.

Then, I got out of the hospital and attempted suicide, which also involved a lot of cutting.

I am in a better place now and am not feeling suicidal, but have been having a LOT of anxiety the past few days.

My problem is, I know better than to cut, I know the shame and anger I will feel if I do, but I so desperately want to cut anyway! I don't know what to do anymore....