This sounds terrible. This surpasses emotional abuse because he has isolated you from everything that gives you your own personality. He isn't just putting you down but actually manipulating your entire life. What do you think he would do if you just stopped doing those things? If he came home and the dishes weren't done? Or maybe if the dishes YOU made were done but his weren't?

Sounds like those types of things wouldn't get through to him anyways. Sounds like your only option is to get out while you can? I'm sorry you're dealing with this. I hope you can learn to stand up for yourself because it sounds like you know you are worth more than this. Find that courage to tell him to SUCK IT!