Long five months...I haven't done anything in five whole months and it's felt like an eternity. The urge is so strong...I kind of regressed to the rubber band thing even though I always considered it to be more like self harm than self help...I can't hold ice cubes in school obviously so this was my only alternative.

I keep trying hard but it sucks SO badly right now it's f***ing awful I swear to god! It feels like I'm screaming inside whenever even the slightest trigger occurs and it is HELL.

If I look at even a pair of safety scissors for too long I feel like I'm gonna go nuts! This is ridiculous!

Am I the only one who's felt this way? Am I going freaking crazy?