Lynn posted this "It would be good when you're feeling stronger, to look at why you've held on for this long? A.J can't take advantage unless you both let him - which means you also need to look inward" And I pm'd her, not sure why I pm'd because I prefer the forums rather than pm's, but anyway I pm'd her because I did not understand what she meant by "inward work". Her response got me to thinking it would be a good idea to bring it to this thread and maybe I could learn some things about me, from others that might decide to add their opinions...to maybe better understand "me"...

I guess keeping it all in this thread is good because it is about me, AJ and his dad...Mostly about AJ.. But then AJ's dad and I are also part of the picture....

SO I will start with understanding "inner work"... I agree there are always two sides to any story and I am concerned as to what have I contributed to this picture.....? ANY suggestions on "inner work" and how I can see or learn how I am part of this picture??

Oh.. I talked to AJ this afternoon. When he is "sober" he is delightful to be around. Even his friends hate being around him when he is drunk, esp when he drinks the "hard stuff" because he acts like such a jerk.. ANY way AJ said he thought I was cooking for the "renter" and not him, which isn't true. But the ending of the conversation he said he was mad ther "renter" drank all the milk...

OK my normal self I have no problem with giving food to anyone that is hungry. BUt I've been taken advantage of many times and this time, I did not offer food to the new "renter". I told the new renter if we all contributed to buying food, then everything would be up for grabs.. Well the renter doesn't buy food, laundry detergent, or anything. He didn't pay his rent, as his parents are sending the rent money. He is 25 and works two jobs. So what he does with his money I don't know. So the issue is he drinks all of AJ's milk.. AJ was really mad at the renter, and he took he anger out on me because he "thought" I was giving his "milk" to the renter>>>> soooooooooo OK, I understand "bad times".. but I also understand give and take... If it is all give it ends in being taken advantage of.....

For some reason I feel I am going way off target here.......Not sure how this fits in the picture ..