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Originally Posted by Ygrec23
I am impressed, very impressed, that your mom, even at this late date, recognizes what she did way back then, and that it was wrong.
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Thank you, Ygrec.
Loved everything you wrote.
I think it is amazing what my mom said to me, and that she even did--did I dream it? I was not asking her to say that or admit that or anything. I just made a rather benign statement about how I should have told her when I used to get lost, and she responded as she did--with sorrow, remorse, and honesty.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ygrec
It would seem to me that underneath your mom's frightening and cruel reactions to you when you were tiny, there was a feeling, understanding person.
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I don't know, but I hope so. How I feel about that mom from the past is that "she did the best she could." I came to this "understanding" a few years back in therapy, and it has allowed me to have compassion for her. I wonder if my finally coming to this point helped me give my mom space to say what she did? Maybe it wouldn't have been possible for her to say these things 10 or 20 years ago BECAUSE OF ME. I think it's very powerful to think how the changes one makes in oneself can have these ripple effects. I am not meaning to take credit for growth and change in my mother that may have occurred, but just acknowledging that maybe I did have a small role in my mom's stepping up to the plate. I was able to provide the plate, but the act of stepping up to it was all hers?