yagalada, perhaps it would be beneficial to go to couples counseling? If he's not willing to go to couples counseling, you may want to go yourself. The therapist may have ideas on how to deal with this. It may also help for your husband to go to a Pdoc appointment with you. I went to a bipolar education group that was excellent and there were many spouses, family members that were there, so perhaps they offer a similar program in your area. The book in my signature is for spouses and family members......based on your post I don't know if he would be willing to read it.

We can't force people to understand, empathize with what we're experiencing and perhaps his bias comes from his experiences growing up. It may also come from his fears of his own experiences with mental illness. As far as people using it as an excuse I'm sure there are people that can do this, but it's also difficult to make that judgement without actually experiencing what they're going through.