This is when i believe it all started. Last May, I gotten my evaluation from work from my boss-lady. She had wrote down all the things I did, my emotions, attitude, all pertaining to work. She gave me a copy of this list. That has stuck with me for the longest. She told me that she been noticing this since 3 months prior to May. I was in disbelief because i didn't noticing any of the things she was saying. The only thing I was fed up w/ her because i felt like i was doing all her work and she wasn't doing nothing. I wasn't use to working by myself. I use to work two jobs at the same place until my boss now pull me up full time. I was devasted to leave my other job. Crying and everything. My former employees including my bestie would come and check on me. They still do now. It seems every since then, my mood has went down down down. I feel I am not good enough. I am not doing my best. I am a failure. Just awful. My friend told me recently, when we was talking about my moods,that she knew then that it was going to eat at me. I shook my head, yeap, you are right.
Then little over 3 months ago, my grandpa had died suddenly in the hospital. That was a big blow to the family. We were all devasted but we hung in there for each other. Have a good support system. We close but now that close to where i will feel comfortable to go up to them and tell them what is wrong with me.
I have a boyfriend who i can't really touch or conversate with because he is lockup. We have good moments and bad. Right now, it is like we are hanging on with a thread. He wants me to open up but i can't not fully like that. I keep trying to compare him.

There is plenty of more. These are just some of the things. Yall, I am just not sure. Just want to change these bad "funks" into good "funks".