Before this thread slips off the map, I want to say thanks for all the wise and thoughtful responses. This board is a special place.
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Originally Posted by WePow
You know the truth from your mom's face. It is a form of validation. Sometimes, seeing our pain "in black and white" makes us realize that it really was trauma. And sometimes it is just so much easier to HOPE that what we remembered just never happened.
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The look on her face is haunting me. It was hard to bear.
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Originally Posted by treehouse
I think that on some unconscious level, I have a hope that someday, someone will apologize for the things that were done to me as a child....or at least acknowledge them.
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I hope that someday you will find this.
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Originally Posted by PAYNE1
I've had a somewhat similar experience with my elderly mother. She was emotionally abusive to me, and I was very scared of her. This pattern even continued into adulthood. But she has since acknowledged her abuse and even apologized. I know she did the best she could. Her parents were even more abusive to her......
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PAYNE, I'm glad you got that apology and healing. (My mother had a difficult childhood too, including SA.)
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Originally Posted by chaotic13
What I realized in that moment was-"I actually had compassion for a drunk man!" My father was a drunk and that was something that I was never able to give him during his lifetime. But I can do it now, so there is a sense of healing there for me.
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chaotic, you always seem to understand so well where I am at. Your experience with the drunk man provides an example of how we can still heal, long after our parents have died. Thanks for sharing that.
Perna, thanks for sharing the stories from your childhood. I could relate a lot to the "tone" of what you told.