hey, Sadface.. I just realized something...

Is THAT where my husband goes when he is working "late"? To your house? Are you his other family? Or are they twin brothers, separated at birth??

Seriously, I know how you feel, and I'm not just saying that! I certainly do not think that what he is doing is okay, and I don't want to let these guys off the hook. But as I get older I have realized a few things that actually do make me feel better about all of this, depending on my mood of course!

I think the key phrase you used here is "emotionally stunted." Because they really are. But I don't think they just decided to be that way, or even do it on purpose. They don't know any better, even if you say it over and over again. Women really are the superior sex.

Ok ok, so I KNOW there are exceptions, but women and men are really different. I think sometimes we forget that- we expect other people to think and feel the same way that we do. When they don't, we take it personally, but it really has nothing to do with us. They are just incapable of the same warmth and caring and depth of emotion and understanding that we have! And, depending on the circumstances of how they were raised, it can make men some even harder to deal with than they otherwise would be.

I do best when I just lower my expectations.. then I don't get disappointed, and any little good thing that happens thrills me. Avoiding him is also good; absence doesn't make my heart grow fonder but it helps me from going crazy and killing him.

Distractions are also good. Sure, there are the usual walks or music or movies or computer time, but don't forget the classic standbys of shopping, good chocolate, wine, or perhaps masturbation, or all four.

I am not a big sports fan, but I find that sometimes I can watch to just check out the guys, and of course to make comments on their uniforms or colors or ask questions which really bug him, like "where does that invisible line on the football field come from?" and "why aren't there any white guys on the basketball court?"

And finally, always remember that you are not alone in this. The bottom line is that if you trade him in, you will just get a different model. He may not have those same issues, but there will be something else, because everyone has their ----. So, choose your battles, and whenever you are upset with him say "It could be worse.. he could be a _______ (insert some unthinkable thing)" and count your blessings that he is indeed "a good man", as you say.

(Oh, and I just want to add one more thing. A long time ago I was complaining to my husband that he didn't love me, or show me that he did. His response: "What do you mean?? I washed your car today, didn't I ??")