I agree with Petunia. Let them know when you are planning to have your meal and then they can adjust accordingly. Even if they just come late. They can bring something or not. Make what you want to make and go from there. Buy less shrimp. If it is there for them to try when they get there, great! If not, sorry `bout your luck. I'm sure there will be plenty of other food.

It's your house.

I guess what I am saying is, pick your battles.

You seem to be making the effort to include them and they don't sound all that receptive. Again, I say, it's your house do what you like - they can like it or lump it.

By Christmas night, for me, I might as well not have had Christmas, ya know? It's like when I told Chuck when he was calling me the night of my birthday to wish me a happy birthday. It was over by then! My birthday may have been happier if he had called me the night before!

IMO, Christmas is just a day, honestly. It's the family togetherness that is important. Whether that occurs on the 25th, the 26th, or the 30th. At least that is what my mom says. As for the birthday thing, at least he cared enough to call, you know?

Good luck.