dear Bmee2,
is hard to say. we feel the same. fear to tell, fear to feel, hide so so many years, never tell. was shame to tell, was me was wrong, not the others who hurt us. was my fault. oh no, so wrong that is!

scared to come here to d.i.d area most days. would rather run away and laugh it away or cry silent tears and hide again. this is not good i know now. is very important to face and go through memories and then better on the other side is healing.

so tired of the mask i wear for the world. so tired of the lies i say to stay accepted and not called crazy in head. only trust a very few.

sunday had to go to emergency room for fall...hurt knee. told the nurse new diagnosis d.i.d. then yelled "no no! don't put that down! work might see!"

ladymacabethadmunsen is right:
In order to "be able to put the past in the past and leave it there" you need to process it first. You probably don`t hang on to the past, but the past will be hanging on to you until you listen....


is time Bmee2. *i* am 63. we can do this together. am holding your hand. we deserve a good life. no blame, no shame, it wasn't our fault.