I am now moved in and doing okay in school. I'm stressed beyond belief. I have never wanted to SI more. But yet something stops me. Because I know I can only do it when people are not around, and that just makes it so that I don't know how to handle things. I'm sacared, worried, and just about everything. I'm studying Psychology, to hopefully fix myself.... but I wish I was further along, so that the pain would stop.

Pain, why do you seek me.
What did I do to you.
The only thing I have done is tried to be me
And yet there you stand waiting, watching
for the moment in time that I give up.
I have to say pain, you are a huge pain in my side.
Just go away, and stay away from me.
Let me be.
I just want to be able to focus without your nagging influence on me.
Go away pain.