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Originally Posted by htownkboxer
You think it could really have THAT much of an effect on everyone?
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Congratulations, you're normal.
It is said that in a person's late teens and early-mid 20's, it is common to feel "invincible" (okay, they don't really think they are invincible, they just have a stronger sense of "bad things happen to other people, they don't really happen to me" that is supposedly common throughout humanity). Yes, I do believe that it can have that much of an effect on everybody. I don't believe that it has exactly the same effect on everybody (but generally close enough) and I'm pretty sure that it takes a different amount for a particular level of damage to each person, but eventually after enough usage, the same sort of thing happens to everybody.
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Originally Posted by htownkboxer
I do find I'm much more inflective and clairvoyant. I've actually come to understand myself a LOT more. It's nice.
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Inflective is probably quite true. Pot decreases activity in certain parts of the brain, so you don't have all the irritating and distracting thoughts of an untamed mind getting in your way. Another way to accomplish that is to actually tame the mind rather than put a chemical leash on it. There are some good meditations at the very beginning of this free book that can help: (had to remove link because I don't have enough posts yet. Please search
Mastering the Core Teachings of the Buddha) and no, you don't have to become Buddhist to use the meditations, nor will following these meditations magically turn you Buddhist.
It might be easier to smoke pot than to develop the discipline of meditation, but if you tame your mind through meditation rather than pot, when you use inflection there will be more to inflect on.
As for clairvoyance, since pot doesn't give you anything you didn't have before, there are 2 possibilities. The pot may turn off the part of the brain that blocks yor natural clairvoyant abilities, or pot could present you with the false impression that you are clairvoyant. Being fooled by your mind - losing your touch with reality - would be bad enough to say that pot is a bad thing; but I'd say that it would be even worse if pot has already shut off your blocking mechanism for clairvoyance. First, if pot shuts that down, it can shut other things down including the clairvoyant ability itself. Second, if there is a blocking mechanism there, it has to be there for a reason. It makes sense to me that we shouldn't have clairvoyance until we have reached a certain level of mental development.
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Originally Posted by htownkboxer
unfortunately I'm also a bit timid/shy now so meeting new ppl (especially putting myself out there in this state) is a high anxiety task for me. I feel like if I put on a fake happy face they'll see right thru. So i withdraw a lot.
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Yeah, people can spot fake happy, but if you got in a new environment and just took school or your new job seriously, the sense of accomplishment can lead to happiness - and new people will come with the new environment.
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Originally Posted by htownkboxer
I still feel the need to appease my father just to make my mom's life easier. It's not that I'm forced to do this, it's b/c I don't want him spilling his negativity to my mother. She's pretty much forced to be his emotional sponge. I don't think that's healthy at all.
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You're not
forced into this, just manipulated by your own conscience... and maybe slightly influenced by them, too. Your mother also isn't forced into taking his negativity. She chooses every day to stay in that situation, and she chooses every day to not require behavioral improvement from your father.
You're right that it isn't healthy - it isn't healthy for either of you.