I am "high functioning", so they say. I imagine that I did sound too "good", but I also did sound scared and unsure. I am still very scared this job won't work out for me or for them. I don't know how to make the car payment next week so it doesn't affect my already bad credit. I called the bank but was left with the worst options. Basically, they want money. The only potential way of deferring payment one month and adding it as an extra month on the loan is to let my credit get alot worse in doing it.

I am trying to pay other bills late as well after I get my first paycheck in January. I called my T's billing office and they very nicely said they would defer billing until next month. There really aren't any other bills that I can do that with. I had another car repair today so I could drive the car safely--that was $187 after they kindly and slightly reduced the price for my situation. I still have to get rear breaks done--about $170. I just paid a whole month of income ($600) for a wheel bearing about 7 weeks ago. The other two things creeped up over the past two weeks. Why everything at once?! Especially when I lose my job in between them! I haven't had any chance to rebuild my bank accounts. I had to charge the repair today, like I did half of it last time for the wheel bearings. I have very little room left on that card now. It's a small limit that I got just for emergency, like sudden car repairs. If it weren't for that card, I'd have literally nothing by now--but severe, extreme stress! That card has bought me some time--literally.

I so have to keep this job! I don't know how I will get my kids the presents they want for Christmas. I will still need money for gas for the car. The other bills. I won't have enough for everything due over the next couple weeks. I have alot more number crunching to do.