Oh, and we don't we all use a form of manipulation in our relationships, either to get what we need or to either induce or avoid a certain reaction or response? All manipulation isn't deviant or disordered.....
and trying to get what you need in a relationship doesn't always have to be termed as manipulation either, anyway, I don't think!
(I'm not trying to enable or excuse anyone or deny BPD tendencies in anyone....nor do I really want to argue about rainbow's tendencies, or argue at all! Those are just my general thoughts/feelings...)