Does anyone ever read the links that are provided?

The "manipulation" is not conscious. Rainbow is not sitting there saying I am going
to manipulate my T into doing what I want. Then when my T gets overwhelmed and
sets new boundaries I will get upset, frustrated, sad, angry, etc.

It happens because it is a pattern of borderline behavior, just as your intense attachement
to your T is a pattern. Then when she does something that you don't like, you post
or send her an email telling her that she hurt your feelings, doesn't like you, etc.

These are patterns of behaviors. And you refuse to look at them.

You also are not wanting the SELF to lead if you want to focus on IFS because you keep looking for your T, to fulfill that need. You even keep telling her, you don't want to help the parts, but you want her to do it.

The thing is that you don't even try to focus on the behavioral patterns, you just want your needs met.

If you want to be in therapy for along time, that is your business, but I think you are fooling people in thinking that you want to solve the problem, because you don't look at the behaviors, just "what I want, what I need, etc"

For example: 'I want to attach to my T and it is ok.. my child parts needs that." As opposed to asking yourself why your SELF does not want to soothe and comfort your child parts and fight the "wanting" so that you can do what is needed to get healed...after 11 months.

But it would be the same as the fact that you avoid therapy types that are scientifically proven to help heal BPD or BPD behaviors -- ie. DBT, Schema, TFT.

IFS is not..neither is EMDR.
EMDR is great for PTSD and those with flashbacks, avoidance symptoms, hypervigillance, etc.


shalom.